Lessons Learned Living Through Cancer
Cancer doesn’t care about age. Four and a half years ago I would have never believed it if someone told me I’d be diagnosed with cancer at age 39. Me? Seemingly healthy, active, and youngish. I took my health for granted a little too long and the unbelievable happened in late July 2018 when I was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer. I had put off well woman care for 6 years at that point. I made excuses to not go because of childcare, work schedules, and even telling myself, “I don’t need to go.” I credit my husband’s insistence to even go see an OB/GYN for a long overdue well visit in mid-July. The checkup was smooth until the end-the breast exam. A lump was detected. I had no clue. I had finished breastfeeding my last baby 8 months prior. In fact, I had touted to many family members that I was reducing my risk of breast cancer by breastfeeding a total of 5 ½ years for four kids. I now know that the benefits of breastfeeding aren’t that simple (sadly for my sake).
The following seven months involved surgeries, chemotherapy, radiation, and a lot of grief. I was humbled to the core of my identity. I lost my hair, breasts, independence, and a large sum of money for something I never asked for. It was stressful to say the least. However, through that difficult time I saw so many people gather around my family and I in such generous ways. That also humbled me. We never lacked for food or the money to pay any bills due to the sacrificial giving of many people. God didn’t miraculously heal me from cancer, but He never left my side. He taught many, many things during that time. One, I have nothing to truly fear as His child. My body will fade away, but my soul is eternal. Two, don’t take good health for granted. Know your risk factors and advocate for early screening. Three, invest time and energy in things that really matter. For me, that’s walking with God through life, treasuring family, and friendships, and doing work I love. Four, my identity isn’t defined by what I do, how I look, or my ability to be in control. Ohhh that was a hard one. It took bringing me to almost nothing for me to realize that I’m not in control. However, now I realize there is a lot of freedom and joy in knowing that I am not in charge. I’m not perfect this side of cancer. It may even come back, but I’m living life one day at a time and that’s way more than I was doing before.
I share all of this to strongly urge mothers to care for yourselves as well as you care for your babies. You are worth it. Life is worth living.
